Missing my Girl

UPDATE 6/28/08: Thank you ALL for your prayers and sweet comments of encouragment. I usually respond by visiting your blog, but I feel I really need to stay off the computer and focus on God right now. I can usually balance both but my attention and little energy I have must be His. I love you my sisters in Christ. This is what it's all about isn't it? Leaning on Him together. Thank you again, you all are just the biggest blessing to my heart. At She Speaks Sat. night they handed out cards with a word on it and a verse. Mine was ABLE and my verse: Habbakuk 3:19"The Sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on the heights" Only God would know how much I would need that particular word and verse in my life within days. Only God. You are so worth all of this pain Lord. So worth it.
Love, Lelia


I just want to thank all of you who have prayed for my family from yesterday's post. What a blessing you all are.

Last night we talked with her and thought it went good until at 9:45 I got a text from one of her friends saying that Alyssa had left. I ran upstairs to find Amiyah in her bassinet crying , but no Alyssa. She had packed a bag and left. She won't take my calls but did text last night about 10:30 saying that she didn't want to leave her baby but thinks this is the best thing to do right now.


This morning I hopped over to my new friend Kim's blog called Seasons of my Heart. Let me share a little of what touched my heart:

Remember, nothing we face, surprises God. He’s aware of everything, so why not rest in his presence and remain “yoked” to him?I’m learning that my worst day with Jesus, (being yoked to him) is better than MY best day (outside of his yoke) without him!!!We each face different situations, trials, and circumstances, yet our Savior, remains. Are you willing to give up “yourself”..and your "pride".. so you can take on his yoke, which is easy, and your burden will become lighter?

~Kim from Season of my Heart~

She also shared The Message version of Lamentations 3:22-24 and I thought: Lord, you know just what I need.

I'll never forget the trouble, the utter lostness, the taste of ashes, the poison I've swallowed.I remember it all—oh, how well I remember— the feeling of hitting the bottom. But there's one other thing I remember, and remembering, I keep a grip on hope: God's loyal love couldn't have run out, his merciful love couldn't have dried up.They're created new every morning.

How great your faithfulness!

I'm sticking with God (I say it over and over).

He's all I've got left.

When I read these verses I see my daughter one day sharing her story. Sharing how it felt to hit the bottom, but to realize that God was all she's got left. I get excited to know that she is being watched over by the very One that created her.

I know that although it made me crumble into a heap of despair the moment I found out Alyssa had left, God did not jump out of His throne, hit the red panic button on the wall and ask the angels "What do we do now?" No, my daughter did not shake the floors of heaven.

He's in control and with all of my heart, mind, soul and strength I believe that. Doesn't mean the tears will stop falling, but it does mean that my faith in the God who is crazy about my daughter is increasing minute by minute. I can't wait for her hardened heart to melt into His hands no matter how long it takes.

As much as this is killing the flesh women in me, the women that wants nothing more than more of Jesus is excited and when I'm not on my knees I am sitting on the edge of my seat with a heart of expectation. Expecting my Savior to do what He does best. I look at His history and He just doesn't do anything small. He's just amazing that way.

Earlier I talked with this wonderful Sprint operator in Florida who is expecting her 3rd child in November. We just talked a little of what is happening and she said "when you believe in God everything will be okay." AMEN!

Here is a poem I wrote for my friends prodigal daughter when she had come home.

The dark slimy figure made its way up to the throne
Hissing and laughing Satan said to Jesus, I’ve always known
I’ve always known that this young lady’s heart would belong to me
Nothing you’ve done for her matters not even dying on a tree
Getting her to remain in this lifestyle is something I know I always can
For making her feel hopeless is how I keep her living out my plan
My plan to kill her dreams, steal her joy and destroy her entire life
I want her days to be filled with nothing but anger and strife
I want her to live a life full of misery and defeat
I will keep her self esteem low underneath my feet
Satan then looked at Jesus and shouted I will never quit
As long as I can keep her down in this dark and lonely pit
Don’t you see Jesus as long as she is on the earth
She will believe me when I tell her that she has no self worth
Suddenly Jesus stood up and the room became so bright
His voice thundered as He looked at Satan and said I too will continue to fight
As Jesus walked forward the Prince of Darkness began to cry and tremble
For this coward knows the power the Son of God does resemble
Speaking boldly the King said I’ll never give up on capturing her heart
For my Princess is worth more than any rare piece of art
You have plans of destruction where my plans promise that she’ll succeed
You’ll lead her straight to death where to a new life is where I’ll lead
There will come a day when she falls completely in love with Me
And I will be the center of her life you just wait and see
For she is my child and she is worth fighting for at all cost
I’ll never give up on her and I’ll comfort her when she feels lost
She is beautiful, worthy, lovely, special, and precious in my sight
And I will be her Hero and her Holy Defender in every single fight
The battle for her heart will never end until she gives her life completely to Me
And I will continue to fight for her until she allows Me to set her free
Jesus had slowly backed Satan into a corner of the throne room
Looking defeated the enemy quickly slithered back down to his pit of gloom
The angels immediately began to praise and worship the Almighty One
For they knew that her heart would soon belong to the Son
As Jesus took His place back upon His heavenly throne
He lovingly looked down on her and whispered…You are mine child this
I’ve always known!
©2006 Lelia Chealey

Jeremiah 29:11-13
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

Lord Jesus, I trust in You completely.

My Dad wondered about Post-Partum Depression. I never thought of that and am not clear on all the symptoms, but will look into this. Thinking back on last night alone though, when she walked into the room to talk with us I was holding Amiyah and she never once looked at her. So unlike this mom who is so in love with her baby. Oh sweet Jesus, please continue to watch over my girl.

Love you,