It's just hair

I've been going to the same lady to cut my hair for 20+ years now.
She knows my natural curly hair.
We have an honest relationship.
She'll tell me "no" when I take her a picture of impossibility out of a magazine.
And I'll tell her when she needs to fix what she did.
She knows when she's given me a cut I don't like because after a few days I'll call her back to see when she can fit me in her tight schedule.
But overall she has gotten it right the first time.


There have been only a few hair cuts over the years that I've absolutely hated.
But never enough to go find someone else to put up with my head of hair.


We've been through a lot together over the years.
Three salon moves.
My wedding day.
Short styles.
Long styles.

Births of my kids.
Our daughters' graduations.
Shattered dreams.
Births of my grandgirls.

We have laughed together.
We have cried together.
Like ten years ago when her 15 year old son went to sleep and never woke up.

She gets me compliments on my hair.
Like this sweet one Lisa Whittle wrote on her blog last summer after we met at She Speaks...
I told her she had great hair. And I meant it. (She does.)




So after all that history, how do I tell her that I hate the hair cut that she gave me on Saturday?

I don't.

Because I know that even though I was in her chair and
even though she knows my hair and
even though the customer is always right,
I also know that I didn't have her full attention on Saturday.

Instead, she had mine as she told me about her wedding in May.
And how only 3 weeks as a new bride she found out she has cancer.
Our tears and my hair fell to the floor as she told me she'll be starting 3 rounds of chemo soon.
And how her bottle blond hair will soon be falling out.
She looked up at the ceiling and bit her lip as she said It's just hair.
The cheerleader in me wanted to show my support by telling her to go ahead and just shave all my hair off, but the vain girl in me wouldn't even suggest it.




So now I have a choice.
Call her up and tell her that my teenage son Aaron said, "Mom, no offense, but you have kind of a tomboy haircut."
OR
I can let it be and pray for her as I promised her I would do.






What I thought was going to be my day to get beautified actually turned out to be an hour of listening, crying and silently begging God to give me the words to say to her.
As I sat in her chair listening to her fears come out through her trembling lips I knew that I just needed to listen.
I carry a pocket Bible in my purse so when I went to get my wallet and write her a check,
I grabbed that first and read her Jeremiah 29:11-13.
As I inserted her name and personalized the verses she started to cry again and thanked me as we tightly hugged each other.
And I thanked Him for the words He gave me to say to her.




And as I left her salon looking like a tomboy with a bad hair cut and tiny pieces of my own hair all over my shirt from us hugging, I never felt as pretty as I did that moment.

Because I honestly didn't care about my hair.






When someone is faced with the possibility of losing her life, the importance of hair that gets compliments really becomes meaningless.
It's just hair is what she said about the side effect she knows is coming her way from the chemo.
And It's just hair is what I told my son when he gave me his sweet opinion of my new do.






Let's take a look around us and see who needs our prayers.
When I look beyond the boundaries of my personal space, it's amazing the needs of others that I see and how my problems become really small.
So before we complain or whine about the petty things, like a bad haircut, let's pray.
Pray for those who are facing real issues like Randy & Shalana
and heartaches like this young Momma who lost her little boy 8 years ago on August 26th.

And remember...

It's just hair.

For me anyway,

but to her it's watching cancer

take what it can.

~Many Blessings~

Living in a Wal-Mart world

This morning at seven I got off work and raced over to Wal-Mart to get a few things before the kids went to school.

Right after you walk into the store there is a bench next to the McDonald's entrance.

On that bench this morning there was an elderly man sitting alone.

I smiled at him and said, "Aren't you in the wrong place?"

He smiled back and said, "I'm just waiting on my wife."

Normally, I wouldn't ask a stranger a question like that, but this man was wearing a hat and shirt that said Super Saver on them.

Super Saver is a big local grocery store chain in Nebraska.

Not an everything you need under one roof kind of store such as Wal-Mart, but still competes to win our business for groceries.

So as I was rushing through the store and even on my drive home I kept thinking about that man and how out of place he looked. In his yellow shirt and hat with Super Saver embroidered on them, he was surrounded by employees donned in the blue vests with the white letters across the chest that read Wal-Mart.

He was out of place.

He didn't fit in.

He was noticed.

He stood out.

He was different.

He didn't blend in.

He caught one's attention.

He was on foreign ground.

The thought God gave me before I even got past the smell of Egg McMuffins is that

this is how it is for a Christian.

In 1 Peter 1:11(NIV) says that we are:

...as aliens and strangers in the world...

And I love how the Message Bible reads:

Friends, this world is not your home, so don't make yourselves cozy in it.

When we accept the gift of salvation from Jesus Christ and invite Him into our life then we become a foreigner.

We are instantly different.

We become aliens.

Strangers.

Does your love for Jesus make you stand out?

Are you an alien?

Does the faith you have in Jesus Christ make you look like you're wearing a

Super Saver uniform in a Wal-Mart world?

When Jesus invades us we are not the same.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

2 Corinthians 5:17

It's much easier to laugh along with everyone else at raw jokes your co-worker makes in the break room or just ignore the inappropriate e-mail you were sent instead of asking the sender to not forward you stuff like that.

It's easier to keep quiet on your beliefs instead of voicing what you believe during a discussion with a friend.

Blending in is much easier than standing out by choice.

Conforming to the world is the easy way out, but in Romans 12:2 we are told

Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed...

My parents do foster care and last Easter my Mom bought all of the girls the same white dress with purple flowers.

She has done this before because it is much easier for her to buy the same thing instead of finding each girl a different outfit.

I'm sure this is what the Mom's of multiples do too.

But each child of Jesus is not the same.

He doesn't dress us alike so we all look and act the same.

We all have different talents and pasts that He wants to use for His glory.

We may never know whose life will be changed when we allow Jesus to be known through us.

So today my dear friends, let's try to stand out for Christ.

I don't mean for you to go grab your Bible and start screaming hell burning messages on the street corner. That kind of distraction only brings attention to oneself anyway.

I'm talking about being aware of the small opportunities He puts in your every day to show the world Jesus.

If we are willing, He will use us.

And just like the Super Saver employee in a sea of Wal-Mart employees,

because of our Savior we will stand out and be different.

Have a wonderful weekend.

~Many Blessings~

My Rock Star

Today is Alivia's first day of the 3rd grade.

Seems like just yesterday she was born.

Tomorrow our 15 year old son Aaron will start his sophomore year.

I'm beginning to think these kids are the reason I feel so old.

Here are her new kickers...decked out in stars.

This morning, Gene was packing her lunch and I pulled out Alivia's lunch pail from last year.

The one with the 3 Disney Princesses on it.

The one she loved in 2nd grade just a few months ago.

Much to my surprise, Alivia freaked out.

"MOM! No! I am not a baby, Mom!

I am in 3rd grade now.

THIRD GRADE Mom.

I am not taking a lunch pail with characters on it.

I'm a rock star girl now Mom."

I'm pretty sure she was talking to me.

Then she waved her hands as if to tell me just forget it Mom, you don't get it, as she said,

"I will just take my lunch in a Wal-Mart bag."

Ummm. No.

(Amazing what visual aids you can find on the internet.)

While Gene was slapping Hellman's on the bread for her sandwich I heard him mumble, "Oh brother".

I found this to be a new challenge.

Mission:

Before going to work, must find a lunch box worthy to be held by a rock star girl.

I quickly assured our former princess turned rock star that she will not take her lunch in a plastic bag.

Obviously her Dad wasn't concerned with his daughter's cafeteria status, when he put her lunch in the Wal-Mart bag and tied it shut.

Truth be told, the Princess lunch box smelled like old food so I didn't mind buying her a new one.

Arriving to school, I started walking her to class, but my escort service was shortened in the entrance of the school when she again informed me she is not a baby.

"Goodbye Mom. I love you."

So, there I stood waving goodbye to my baby princess rock star 3rd grader.

Even though she never looked back at me.

Satisfied I could still kiss her in public and get an I love you, I left the school grounds with my unhurt feelings and went on my mission.

A mission with specific instructions:

No characters.

After two stores and no success, Alivia finally went from this lunch box apparently suitable for babies like Amiyah and Juliana,

to this 3 dollar find at CVS Pharmacy...perfect for a pre-tween Hannah Montana wanna be.

Apparently Alivia is not the only one striving to let go of Sleeping Beauty, Belle and Cinderella.

This was the last one, hidden behind about 5 Princess Lunch Boxes.

Two words: Mission Impossible.

With a smile on my face and a skip in my step, I left the new "I'm not a baby" lunch bag in the office, so I didn't get to see her reaction.

I'm pretty sure when she sees it, I will receive the Mother of the Year award.

At least in her big girl Rock Star world.

I can't imagine this child as a teenager.

Lord, have mercy on me.

AFTER SCHOOL UPDATE FROM THE MOUTH OF A BABE:

Hi, this is Alivia.

My first day of school was so awesome. So was my teacher and friends.

And my lunch pail is SO me.

I had to walk all the way to the office to get it, but I LOVED the lunch pail.

My friends said that it was pretty too.

Alright, goodbye.

I'm going to eat my milk with brownies in it and it is soooo good.

Love,

Alivia E'Lise Chealey

~Many Blessings~

You know you're married to the coolest guy ever when...

You can't find a photo without him flashing you the peace sign.

Ever.

He claims its his "signature pose".
I claim it to be annoying because he does it every time I take a picture.

I'm so glad Alivia doesn't copy him in this area.

For years now he has done this.

This is a re-take picture after me threatening Gene I was going to break his fingers if he did it again.

She is such a traitor.
Anyway, signature pose alone did not convince me I was married to the coolest guy ever until this morning when we had this conversation...



Me: Okay, so you and Alivia have dentist appointments tomorrow.

Gene: Wait a minute, we both have appointments?

Me: Yes, remember you scheduled them originally for Wednesday evening, but because of church I switched them to Tuesday?

Gene: Oh, okay. I'm picking up what you're laying down.


Me: What?

Gene: You heard me.

Don't covet girls...it's not godly.

Please don't be jealous if your husband or boyfriend is over 44 and he doesn't have a signature pose or just says "ok" when he understands something.


After almost 20 years together, ten of them being his wife, I just found out last week that he was a wrestler at one time in his life.

Who is this guy?


I have no idea, but what I do know is he is smoother than any baby's bottom.

If you are in doubt of my husband's coolness, read this.

It will definitely convince you that he is as cool as a cucumber.

~Peace~

P.S.
I am in no way making fun of the human love of my life.
Without his consent.
When asked if I could blog about this, he gave me a thumb's up.
I just pray that doesn't become his new signature pose.

Can't cope without Him

I haven't participated in Then Sings My Soul Saturdays with Amy for quite some time.

Visit her blog to hear other songs that have meaning.

Or join in if you have a song you want to share.

***********

Sometimes I get really overwhelmed with just His Name.

Have you ever just said the Name Jesus over and over again?

Just something about it.

So much power and yet gentleness in one breath.

What was it like for the angel Gabriel who told Mary what she would name her baby?

Were his eyes filled with tears when he said "you shall call his name Jesus"?

When I gave birth to my firstborn, I remember the doctor asking me her name.

Alyssa, I proudly answered with lots of tears.

And you never forget when the nurse hands you your little one and you hold her for the first time.

And then the incoming pour of company wanting to take a look at her.

But Mary was holding Jesus.

Our Savior.

Did Joseph understand Who his young bride was holding in her arms?

Was he overwhelmed when Mary said His name is Jesus.

No doctors or nurses making a big deal about His entrance.

No anxious family and friends in the waiting room.

Just them.

And Him.

How was it for Mary to hold Him in her arms?

Against her chest?

Counting His toes and fingers?

Did she know as she held Him that He was the One sent to hold her?

To hold her against His Holy chest and hear her heart beat.

Did she know He was sent to save her?

She held the Savior.

The One they would give back to His Father after only 33 years and yet never let go of Him.

JESUS

Your Name not only brings me to tears, it has the power to bring me to my knees.

I am nothing without You.

You are the only perfect in Me.

I need You.

This song brought me to tears in my driveway the other day.

Watching Shalana walk this journey in complete faith is mind blowing to me and to know that if she didn't have Jesus, there is no way she would be coping.

He is what this life is about.

When life is good.

When life is tough.

When there is health and when there is sickness.

JESUS

Our sweet Savior who knows we need Him, but sits back and waits for us to ask Him.

If you don't know Him...oh sister, you have no idea Who you are missing out on.

He is amazing and like no other.

Have a blessed weekend.

~Many Blessings~

My life is just full of blog material

FIRST OF ALL...

Thank you for your powerful prayers and words of encouragement you left in my last post for Randy & Shalana. She sat at my kitchen table the other night reading your comments with tears falling.

God is working in mighty ways and He WILL get the glory, however He chooses to write the next chapter of their lives.

Our God...so mighty and faithful!

Please continue to pray for them and I will keep you updated.

We are trying to get ready for the new school year.

So, last week Alivia went to see Miss Betty to get her hair cut and deep conditioned.

She loved it, I loved it, Daddy loved it.

Money well spent.

WANTED:

Patience and Obedience

Patience: For when you hand your Mom a pair of scissors and ask if she will cut out your pony tail holder and she says "don't cut it out, just wait a second and I'll get it out".

Obedience: To not leave your Mom's office with a pair of scissors and proceed to cut out not only the pony tail holder, but your pony tail.

Alivia E'Lise Chealey

Use of scissors against mother's wishes

8/12/09

As you see in the above picture, at least 4 inches of the top of her hair is missing.

Her story:

She came into my office with a strand of hair and said, "Mom! My hair is falling out!"

My story:

Realizing what she had done, I said through clenched teeth,

"Your hair is NOT falling out, you cut it out. Where is the rest of it?".

She came back and placed the evidence on my desk: (1) cut pony tail holder and (1) ball of hair.

~sigh~

Just to make it clear...the 2 pictures above with the cute hair style are the "Before" pictures.

The mug shot is the "After".

So, another trip to see Miss Betty is well needed as you can well see.

What is your kid hair cut mishap story?

Please share.

~Many Blessings~

No matter what happens kind of faith

When you marry someone you expect to take their last name.

You expect to purchase a home together and become one.

But when you stand before your invited guests to become Mr. and Mrs.,

you do not expect to really have to live out certain parts of your vows.

Or you hope to never have to anyway.

...to have and to hold from this day forward,

for better or for worse,

for richer, for poorer,

in sickness and in health

to love and to cherish...

The part about "in sickness and in health" really takes you to a whole new level of your faith in

God and what you believe He is capable of when you or your spouse are faced with health issues.

The last two years have been tough on Gene and I as a couple. I'm a "fixer" and I can't help my husband get rid of his constant pain. After the 2nd back surgery his back finally feels better, but we found out that he now has nerve damage which is causing excruciating, burning pain in his right leg. He has lost strength in his leg and can barely lift it up to walk. The thoughts of not ever being able to run again or being forced to live with this pain the rest of his life has taken its toll on this athlete's mind.

This week the frustration caused Gene to start taking the high dosage knock-him-out prescribed pain pills again that he had weaned himself off of a few months ago. I started to notice a little depression trying to creep into his mind and then God in all of His mightiness intervened.

In my last post about my son I mentioned our family friend, John Harris.

Here is a picture of John and his beautiful wife, Charlene.

Our families are very close and last week she and I were talking and sharing our prayer requests when she told me she wanted to introduce us to a couple from Missouri that she had just met.

A friend of hers that knows this couple called and asked if Charlene would welcome them to Nebraska as they don't know anyone in this state.

On Tuesday night John and Charlene stopped by to pick us up to go visit them and Gene

backed out because he was in too much pain. As I was leaving, I said, "Gene, I really think you should go with us. I know you're in pain, but this is part of your life right now and you're going to be in pain whether you are lying down or standing. I think you should come." He again said no and then quickly changed his mind. When we got home later that night, he kept saying, "I'm so

glad I went."

Let me introduce you to our new friends....

Randy and Shalana.

Randy is a 37 year old lawyer. Just made partner in his firm in December 2008.

Shalana is a 33 year old RN.

Married for 5 years in June.

Spring of 2008 was when there life would forever change as the normalcy of it escaped them...

Shalana became pregnant.

Randy started having debilitating headaches.

An MRI would reveal that he had an AVM which is explained this way:

Normally, arteries carry blood containing oxygen from the heart to the brain, and

veins carry blood with less oxygen away from the brain and back to the heart. When an arteriovenous malformation (AVM) occurs, a tangle of blood vessels in the brain or on its surface bypasses normal brain tissue and directly diverts blood from the arteries to the veins.

Road trip to the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota where Randy was treated with radiation of the AVM. They were told that over the course of the next year the AVM would continuously shrink.

After returning home Shalana would find out during a check-up that their 14 week baby's heart was no longer beating. A week later their blessing already in God's arms was surgically removed from her womb.

Prior to any of this happening, Randy had already "stopped running from God" as he put it when he answered the call God put on his life to enter ministry. The call to preach the Good News. He was already a successful lawyer and in the military and now God wanted him to preach. The last time he stood behind a pulpit, 5 people responded to the altar call and chose to accept Christ as their Savior.

Then March 2, 2009.

While at work Randy sneezed. Then he complained of not feeling well and said his head hurt.

Trying to stay at work long enough to attend a meeting, his paralegal recognized his slurring words and his confused state. 911 was called and Randy was rushed to the hospital.

Shalana met him there and scans revealed he was suffering a bleed of an AVM to the left side of his brain.

This happened on a Monday morning.

The night before after having worked three 12 hour shifts in a row all Shalana wanted was to sleep as she went to bed.

Randy wanted to talk.

He asked her if he could read her something and as she lay beside him she mumbled, Sure.

So he read her the passage about Jesus in the desert being tempted by the devil for 40 days.

A story of familiarity and so she wondered why he read it as it were his first time hearing it .

He then told her,

"That really spoke to me because if Jesus was tempted by the devil who are we to think we won't go through things and be tempted by the devil?"

Five months later, after much research, Shalana found out of an awesome rehabilitation hospital here in Lincoln just 2 blocks from our home. Not being satisfied with the care he was getting in Kansas, she had him transferred to Lincoln the end of July.

So on Tuesday as Gene and I followed John and Charlene into Randy's room, we had no idea God would meet us there.

Shalana shared their story with us and the tears flowed.

She shared with us some video she had taken of him preaching and our heads shook.

She has Randy surrounded with pictures of their life together before March 2nd, such as this one

on vacation in San Diego...

and a New Year's Eve ball keepsake...

and this one at the beginning of their journey when she surprised him with the news that he was going to be a Daddy....

She misses him reading to her. Being held by him. Hearing him laugh.

She misses their normal.

And yet, this beautiful young bride embraces the new normal that God has entrusted them with and everyday her faith in the Almighty One increases.

She misses Randy trying to convince her that he

knows God has something so big for you.

Something she now believes.

When the doctors say Randy can't, she voices her belief that her God can.

She lets the nay-sayers talk, but doesn't let her faith budge. Not one centimeter.

She believes that miracles isn't just something God did back in the days when donkey's were the main form of transportation. She believes that her husband is a modern day miracle and that God is only getting started.

She believes that the Bible is the Living Word, not just a storybook.

And so she praises God for everything.

For the times Randy whispers words to his therapist.

When he responds to the commands his therapists gives him.

When he gets to go outside.

She puts earphones on her husband so he can listen to the gospel music he has downloaded on his i-pod like he is doing in this picture.

She dances for him and tells him how much she loves him.

And she knows that no matter how different from before he looks that he is still the same, if not better on the inside because He is filled with Jesus Christ.

Before we left his room on Tuesday night Shalana said as she was holding his hand,

"Randy and I met on a cruise and I just keep asking God, why would you give me someone so wonderful to just take him away from me? I know He isn't going to do that, because you see, Randy isn't just my husband." And as her voice cracked she said, "This is my best friend."

We all gathered around his bed holding hands and each one of us prayed.

Later that night I received an e-mail from her thanking us for visiting and on Randy's care page, she described it saying, "we had church in his room".

God alone filled that room with His awesome presence.

If I was a non-believer, I honestly think I would have left saved.

For 2 years now Gene has endured much physically, but after visiting Randy and Shalana

he asked me,

"What am I complaining about? Lord, have mercy. Thank You Jesus."

Shalana and I have talked quite a bit this week and her love for the Lord is evident.

Here we went to encourage them and yet we are the ones feeling blessed by them.

She believes God has not forsaken her or Randy.

She believes in God and believes Him as she lets Paul's words echo from her heart...

the words that Paul penned as a prisoner when he learned to be content in every situation.

From his cell, he encouraged others with the truth that God finishes what He starts...

Phillipians 1:6

being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

Lord, thank you for introducing Charlene to Randy & Shalana.

Thank you for Charlene's obedience to embrace them and also for sharing them with us.

In Randy's silence he has already blessed our lives in a loud way as we see once again that You are a Mighty God as he is still preaching the Good News.

Thank You for his wife's devotion not only to him, but especially to You.

And thank you for using them to show both Gene and I that you are in control and to praise instead of complain.

Please help me to keep focused on You and not the circumstances we face.

And keep giving Shalana the strength to live out the plans Randy knew You had for her.

You never cease to amaze me.

Please keep Randy & Shalana in your prayers.

If you'd like to leave them a word of encouragement, please do so in the comments and I will print them off and give them to her.

If you'd like to send them a written card, please e-mail me at chealey5@yahoo.com and I will send you their address.

Thank you.

~Many Blessings~

Usable

Saturday I went to KC to pick up our son Aaron. He has been in Orlando with Gene's family for an entire month. 32 days without seeing, touching, kissing or wanting to slap his handsome face. He's a teenager so you know I have those days when I want to smack the attitude out of him. But not on Saturday. I just wanted to touch him, hug him and kiss on him.

His plane arrived early so he had just walked outside after getting his luggage when we pulled up to the Southwest gate. So tall and handsome, I couldn't get out of the car fast enough to give him a hug and kiss.

My friend Kelley was with me so he played it cool. He gave me a half smile and nod of the head when we pulled up as if 32 days and nights had never passed between us. The fact that he wasn't jumping up and down at the sight of me didn't matter when he didn't reject my kisses and even gave me a hug followed with an I love you too.

It was so good to have him so close to me again. I just love this kid. He has such a special heart beating inside of him.

He is so caring about his friends.

Cares about where they will spend eternity.

This spring he attended a conference put on by our family friend, Pastor John Harris called Manhood 101. Aaron invited so many of his friends to the conference.

Had some spend the night to make sure they would be there and gave rides to those who had no other way to get there. This is a picture of Aaron receiving a service award from Mr. Harris for his efforts of inviting so many guys.

While Aaron was in Florida, his friend Deondre lost his Mother.

Already fatherless, he was broken hearted when he tried waking her up last Monday morning to find that she had passed in her sleep. Fifteen years old and forced to deal with this major life loss of his 50 year old mother and he turned to my son.

He asked him if he would ask John Harris if he would do his Mom's funeral.

Aaron is best friends with John Jr. and so he called the house to ask John Sr. if he would do it and of course he said yes.

Then Aaron called my Mom and asked if she could print off a few pictures she took when they recently played in a basketball tournament together so that Dre could put some pictures of himself in the casket with his Mom. I went to my Mom's house Friday night and picked up the 111 pictures she had printed of him shooting, dribbling and passing.

Dre tucked 10 pictures of himself next to his Mom.

Then Aaron called and asked his Dad to go to the funeral and represent him.

Saturday morning Aaron called me to make sure Gene was going and said,

"Mom, don't forget to tell Dad to wear black."

His 6 foot 2 frame is so full of compassion.

When Aaron got into the car at the airport, Amiyah had been asleep and didn't wake up until we got to Kelley's house. She absolutely adores her Uncle Aaron as he does her and yet, she would not look at him for anything in this picture.

No matter how hard he tried, she would only look around him, but never at him which gave him a good laugh.

I think she was a little upset that he left her for 32 days...

I must tell you, I am not in anyway bragging on the parenting job Gene and I have done with this kid because Lord knows, we fall so short.

Instead I brag about what God has done and is doing in his life and praise the parenting job Aaron's heavenly Father is doing.

I look at Aaron and I see so much potential.

He earns great grades, is an excellent athlete, is handsome...just the whole package and yet if he doesn't let God have his way with him, none of that matters.

That's the same with all of us.

Whatever gifts God has blessed us and entrusted us with, if we are not using them for His glory, if we are not living our life completely sold out for Him, if we are not concerned about where others are going to spend eternity...

then

what are we doing?

None of what we do matters if we don't do it God's way.

Our life is meant to be used by Jesus for His purposes.

We were created for Him.

We are to glorify Him with our words, actions and life.

We are to help the lost be found.

Love the hard to like.

Embrace the untouchable.

Show compassion to those hurting.

Sometimes Satan can make us feel like we are so small and he's right, we are.

BUT

we serve a God that can take out a giant with a small stone

part a sea

rise up after 3 days of death

and

use a cool teenager to help his friend through a tough time.

Our God is HUGE.

Thank you Lord Jesus for using my son to make me see that You will use anyone willing.

I am willing Sweet Jesus...use me.

HUMBLE WILLINGNESS.

~Many Blessings~

One father's trash is another Father's Treasure

Last Tuesday, my Alivia turned 8 years old.

Here she is with the beautiful cake made for her by my sister Michelle.

Three days later, this is the headline that greeted me when I turned on the computer...

4 Arizona Boys Under 14 Allegedly Lured Little Girl With Chewing Gum in Sex Assault

I continued reading as the first paragraph containing the girls age made me gasp.

She too is 8 years old.

The four boys are ages 9 to 14 and police say they "brutally sexually assaulted her for 10 to 15 minutes". Sgt. Andy Hill called it one of the worst cases the department has ever investigated. The boys are accused of holding the girl down while they took turns molesting her.

Having my own 8 year old daughter, my heart had already gone out to this little one and then I read this:

Police said the girl's parents criticized her after the violence, blaming her for bringing shame on the family. All five children are refugees from the West African nation of Liberia.

Authorities said the victim was in the care of Child Protective Services after her parents blamed her for the rapes and bringing shame to the family.

"The father told the caseworker and an officer in her presence that he didn't want her back.

He said

'Take her, I don't want her,"

Hill said.

In her presence she was denied by her father.

Clearly this little girl did nothing wrong, but apparently that is not the way some think in the victim's hometown in Liberia, which is no excuse. Within a few hours this little girl went from having a family to becoming an orphan by her parent's choice.

The reason I share this is because I was thinking, what if Jesus responded to us like this?

Instead of telling the woman with the issue of blood when she reached out to touch Jesus' clothes, "Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering."

What if He said: Take her, I don't want her.

Instead of telling the sinful woman who wet His feet with her tears, wiped them with her hair, kissed them and then poured perfume on them this, "Your sins are forgiven." and "Your faith has saved you; go in peace."

What if He said: Take her, I don't want her.

Instead of telling the woman caught in adultery that the Pharisees brought to Jesus, "Go now and leave your life of sin."

What if He said, Take her, I don't want her.

Instead of telling the woman at the well when she asked for the living water He had told her about, "I who speak to you am he."

What if He said, Take her, I don't want her.

Unlike the father of this 8 year old, our Father wants us no matter what we have done or what has been done to us. He simply loves us and when we approach the throne of grace to invite Him to be the center of our life, whether its our first time or we are returning

He says, I'll take her. I want her.

In Beth Moore's He Is DVD teaching she said something that stuck with me so deeply about the love of God when I first heard it back on July 18, 2006.

I went and got the notes I took that day out of my desk drawer so I could quote her correctly.

This is what she said:

"God has welcoming joy over you. You have not gone so far or done so much that He does not welcome you home. That's why Psalm 118 begins with and his love endures forever because the psalmist that wrote it determined that if you could wear out the love of God I would've surely done it. Listen carefully and you will hear the joy and gladness of a God who says...welcome home!"

Knowing the things I have chosen to do in my life and the things I am capable of doing, it is a relief to know that I will never be denied by my Creator. He will always love me.

In His presence we are accepted by our Father.

Let's pray for this little girl and thank God that we are treated so much differently when we approach Him than she was by her earthly father. I know if Alivia was ever shunned by Gene for anything, my Daddy's Girl wouldn't be able to handle it.

I cannot imagine what lies Satan is feeding this child.

Thank You God for your enduring love and that You would never tell us we aren't wanted.

To be wanted and loved by a King is unbelievable. Please put someone that believes and knows this about You in this little 8 year old girls path so that one day she can turn this tragedy into nothing but glory for her Heavenly Father that has everlasting love for her.

I love you...I love you...I love you sweet Jesus.

~Many Blessings~

Advice from Baby Amiyah

Some days

you just got to pull out whatever is holding your hair together.

Put your 8 year old Aunt's pink swim goggles around your neck.

And just eat some ice cream.

The way it's supposed to be eaten...

Besides, I can't always look like this.

Love,

Amiyah Elizabeth

Have a wonderful weekend.

~Many Blessings~

Out of His way

Before I share this, I just want to say that anything I share on this blog about my family, especially my daughter Alyssa, I ask permission first.

Now...

Toward the end of Alyssa's pregnancy with Juliana Pearl she was ready to get this precious gift out of her, as most women 9 months pregnant express. So, she went walking and when that didn't work for her, she went to the internet.

She googled her desire and announced to me that she would be having her baby the next day.

"Really. And just how are you going to do this?" I had to ask.

"I'm going to the store to buy castor oil and orange juice and I'm going to mix them together and drink a cup of it. That will start my labor going," she said with much confidence.

"Alyssa, that's gross and it's not going to work." I stated.

"Yes, Mom it will and I'm gonna do it."

She text me later to tell me that she felt sick.

Text me again...I just threw up.

Text me again...I feel really sick.

A few days later, my girl realized that she had bought canola oil instead of castor and drank a cup of it.

Either one would be gross and prove to be just an old wives' tale.

Drinking the wrong thing caused her to be in pain alright, but not labor pain.

Drinking the wrong thing caused her to hold on to a toilet bowl instead of hold on to a baby like she wanted to.

About 3 weeks later, Miss Juliana Pearl arrived.

Without the help of any oils.

Alyssa and I were just talking about this last week and we got to laughing about it.

I told her that sometimes we do this with God.

We try to rush things and not wait on Him and we drink our own cocktail instead of what He wants us to swallow.

Such as the Living Water He offers us.

And we become nauseous.

We can't keep stuff down.

And then we realize that it was our own word instead of His Word that we followed.

Then we really feel sick.

Sick at the thought of what we have missed out.

Castor...canola...our own agenda and it never gets us what we want or need.

Right now I cannot describe what God is doing in my life. Like I shared in the last post, for the first time in over a year, I backed out of doing the YES to GOD blog study even though being in the middle of it.

I'm doing this incredible Bible study by Beth Moore called Jesus: The One and Only and I have to share with you something from it.

This is what Beth wrote that just got me...

I just want to be about God.

Not about ministry.

Not about my own agenda.

Not about writing Bible studies.

Not about me at all.

When all is said and done, I would give my life for people to be able to say,

"She was just about God."

I'm pretty good with words and I tell you I struggle with trying to express what is happening in my heart right now. These last 2 years in my life alot has happened with people I love. A chunk of it I have shared in my blog posts. And some of it, like Mary, I have treasured in my heart.

It has been a season of growth.

A season of crying out to God.

A season of being upset with God.

A season of praying myself to sleep.

A season of 2 steps forward and 10 steps back.

A season of letting go.

A season of enforced boundaries.

A season of forgiveness.

A season of learning responsibility with the gifts God has given to me.

A season of learning to love.

A season of silence.

A season of feeling sorry for myself.

A season of realizing it isn't about me, but all about Him.

A season of trusting God more than myself.

A season of encouragment.

A season of tears, laughter, anger, joy, confusion and a-ha moments.

A season of gain, loss, falling pride and rising faith.

A season of reaching for Jesus and never being disappointed.

A season of trying to do the Christian walk on my own only to fall.

A season of being helped up by the One who gets up off His throne to reach for me.

A season of being witness to Charity, a young Mom pass from death to eternal life.

A season of trial and error.

A season of trial.

This morning I just finished reading a novel and there is a line in it that I really love:

HUMBLE WILLINGNESS: An attitude before God.

Hmmm...that is what I must have in order to draw nearer to Him and in turn He will draw closer to me.

Because I want more.

More of Him.

More seasons with my Savior.

I have been so weepy in my time alone with Him, especially last night just merely thinking of Jesus.

I want more of Him and yet I know what I ask for I am not capable of being able to handle.

All I know is that I'm tired and just want to seek Him like never before.

I want to be like Moses and refuse to take one more step without Him going with me.

Leading me. Taking me. Trusting me. Blessing me.

Following Him. Being taken. Trusting Him. Blessing Him with my life.

I want Him.

Jesus Christ.

The King of all Kings.

Prince of Peace.

Wonderful Counselor.

The One that Charity paused in her battle with cancer long enough to say yes to and has now added pink to heaven's walls while she tirelessly worships her Creator.

The most recent CD Alivia picked out is Cece Winans Thy Kingdom Come. We love it.

The song called Waging War really got to me tonight and so I want to share it with you.

Listen closely to the words.

Because, bottom line is the world we live in is being run by our enemy...the prince of the world.

The Message Bible describes Satan in John 14 as being the chief of this godless world.

I am sick and tired of giving the chief too much freedom in my life. Over my kids, in my marriage. There is no way I would open my front door to a thief and tell him to come in and take what he wants from us. I wouldn't stand still and just watch the enemy interfere in my marriage.

I wouldn't watch the thief punch my son in the gut with rap music that has to have a parent advisory sticker slapped on the outside of the cd case. I wouldn't stand in my daughter's doorway to her bedroom as the enemy tried to convince her to believe the lies of this world.

And yet when I try to run things Lelia-style, that is exactly what I am doing and I'm tired.

Tired of the enemy and tired of not letting God have His way with me like He tells me He wants to in

Jeremiah 29:11-12

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.

I find the overwhelming need and desire to just be about God.

I don't want to be defined by what I write on this blog.

I don't want to tell God the plans I have for me, instead I want to follow the ones that He has for me.

Less of me...more of Him.

Alot more.

I just want to be about God.

If I don't live out my desire to let Christ have His way with me then the legacy I will leave for my kids and my grandchildren will be disastrous.

Alivia can't get enough of this song. I want it to be a song that echoes from her mouth and heart when she is out in the world on her own.

I must get out of His way so He can have His way.

HUMBLE WILLINGNESS.

Have your way sweet Jesus.

I mean it.

No more drinking canola oil and orange juice.

She was all about God...

May this be said of each one that humbly seeks Him.

Many Blessings~

Please take the time to watch this video...it's awesome!

YES to GOD study...

Hey...I have never backed out of a YES to GOD study, which is a good thing since I'm the hostess. But, I am going to have to on this one.

Still reading the book.

Just need a little break from a committed blog post as I seek more depth with God.

When we finished the Behind Those Eyes study with our dear friend Lisa Whittle, we were talking on the phone and she advised me to take a break from doing the studies when God prompted me to do so.

At the time, I didn't feel a break was necessary, but I really need to take her wise advice right now.

I feel prompted.

I know you understand.

Our enemy, he is just nothin' to mess around with.

There is a reason we are to be alert like it tells us to in the Bible.

Because when we're not and he swings and knocks the wind out of us, catching our breath isn't so easy.

I just need to breathe my sweet Jesus in right now.

I am so sorry.

I will be praying about a fall study.

And I hope you finish reading this book as Liz Curtis Higgs' is a fabulous author who knows how to get to the point.

Love you,

I want to look good at the pool too

Ever see those other females at the pool that make you envious?

You know, the ones that make you think...

I looked like that at one time too sweetheart, so enjoy it while it lasts.

Uggh. I saw "one of those" the other day. You know the "ones" I'm talking about...

She looks good in her swimsuit.

Her tan looks perfect and beautiful.

Her hair looks good wet.

So why was I sad when she went home?

Because I love me some Chunky Monkey.

Just look at those thighs and cheeks.

Love her!

~Many Blessings~

Tomorrow chapter 5 of Embrace Grace...cross my heart.