Friday, September 19, 2008

Grace with a Twist

Oh what a week it has been, but nothing compared to what those who have faced Ike have experienced. This afternoon my Grandma will have surgery and so far I have not had attitude when Gene starts a sentence with "Honey, will you get me...".

My mind seems so cluttered though and I'm a little more lost than normal. This week my 7year old daughter showed grace to me. So undeserved and yet extended without a hint of hesitation.

Tuesday, the day Grandma was taken to ER by ambulance while Gene and I were in Omaha with his surgeon, was a day that my 7 year old was oblivious to the stress pressing in on the adults in her family. All she knew in her world was that Tuesday night was SKATE NIGHT for her school.

When she got home from school I told her the news about her Great Grandma and she couldn't wait to go see her. Returning home I cooked dinner while Alivia made a Get Well poster to hang in Grandma's hospital room. She scarfed down spaghetti and garlic bread and we drove the 4 blocks to the hospital to drop the sign off. The plan was to give Grandma the sign, accompanied by hugs and kisses, then off to Skate Zone for an hour of fun on wheels.

Walking to the room we saw all of our family members outside in the hall. The nurses were busy with Grandma so we had a little bit of a wait. Once we were let in her room, Alivia proceeded with our plan then off we went.

We got the skates on and I said "Now get out there, you have 45 minutes to skate!" She rolled herself out onto the floor while being greeted by her excited classmates. Then that's when the guy behind the booth said, "Okay students, we have 2 more songs left."

Two songs left? That's when I asked the mom next to me, "Does this end at 8?"

"Yes" she replied.

"Oh, I thought it was 6:30 to 8:30". I said

Feeling my pain, she said, "No it was 6 to 8".

My girl would had 15 minutes to skate.

Tears filled my eyes as I watched her pattern of skating, falling, laughing, rising over and over again. "How could I have messed this up?" I harshly interrogated myself.

The next time she was close enough, I motioned for her to come to me and she rolled herself up to the wall. I said, "Alivia, Mommy messed up. I thought your party got done at 8:30 but it gets done in a few minutes at 8 o'clock." This is where I expected instant tears, pouting, gasping...just something to make me feel worse. Instead I got a gorgeous smile and "That's okay Mom at least I got to skate". That's when Elizabeth rolled up and I snapped this picture of them together.

(Alivia is on the left).
Leaving me alone, feeling so blessed, she fell a few more times on her bottom hard enough to cause bruising. Then at the direction of the man in the booth she came back to me for help in taking off her skates.

Walking to the car, hand in hand, I thanked her for showing Mommy grace tonight. "Grace? Gracie? She's here?" she said looking around the parking lot. Grace would be my sister's dog.

We decided to go for a snack and while sitting at the Target cafe licking an ice cream cone I took the alone time with her to explain what showing grace meant. That is when she took advantage of our alone girls time together to do some explainin' of her own.

This conversation is very accurate. While still in a state of shock, the blogger in me took the xerox copy out of my purse of Gene's x-ray of his back done that morning and wrote down our conversation on the blank side of it. You'll see why I wanted to have this as a keepsake.

"Mom, can I say something? " she said between licks of her mint chocolate chip ice cream cone.


"You're not modest. Well, one time you were unmodest."

"Oh, why do you say that?" I asked, a little taken back.

"Because" then she began to whisper (thank God). "You were naked in front of Daddy."

She nodded her head and said, "Tons of times".

"What does modest mean to you?" I figured I better ask this since she thought showing grace was a dog show.

"Modest? Not showing parts of your body, like up here" she said as her hand scanned her chest area, home of her future boobies. Then she squinted her eyes, pointing below her belt and said, "And your private parts. Yah. That's being unmodest. When you show those."

Knowing I should correct her and say immodest, but just couldn't bring myself to correct her I asked, "Ummm, why do you think I've been unmodest with your Daddy?"

"Cuz. I watch you all the time. I have eyes like an eagle."

That's when this beautiful Asian woman came around the corner and my sweet child turns toward me with green ice cream on her chin and says...

"Hey Mom. Just think. If you had Chinese eyes then you'd know Kung Fu and you'd be really cool!"

Leaving Target with my jacket zipped to my chin, I just stared at this child who had one minute shown me grace and then flipped the switch on me and called me out on my immodest behaviors.

I think I subconsciously got her back for calling me unmodest when Wednesday night I dropped her off at acting class at 7:10 thinking we were only 10 minutes late. Luckily I asked the lady on my way out, "Pick up is at 8:30 right?"

"No, eight. Class is from 6:30 to 8."

I just smiled as the tears again stung my eyes "Oh, I thought it was 7 to 8:30."

Perhaps one day Alivia will get the Mom of her that is full of purity with beautiful slanted eyes and the ability to kick butt between dropping her kids off places on time. One day.

~Many Blessings~


LynnSC said...

Oh... how precious was that?? And how quickly she went from one subject to the next. If only I could take a lesson from her and just move on instead of grilling the person that I am questioning. Especially when it is something that just doesn't sit well with me.

To become like the little children.
Thanks so much for sharing this cute story with us. What would we do without them???

Jill said...

What a great story - kids have a way with words, don't they!?! But what a blessing for the grace she offered and time you shared. I'm sure it will lead to many more wonderful conversations in the future. Blessings to you, Jill

Edie said...

What a beautiful story Leila! I loved this. You are doing a great job of teaching your daughter godly behavior.

Thanks so much for stopping by my blog and for your thoughts and prayers. You have a very kind heart. I appreciate you letting me know that you're leaving notes up on your "When Women Walk in Faith" study. I am loving my own study so far and appreciate the opportunity to read what others learned. I have actually read a number of posts on it.

Bless you!

Sandra said...

We're only human; and the way I like to see it when I'm running late is that I'm exactly where God wants me to be.


Sandy Toes said...

What a great story...thanks for sharing!
-Sandy Toes

Laura said...

Aren't they amazing? Can't you just wait to talk about that conversation when she is older? What a laugh you will share. what a special time, Lelia. I'm praying for your family, Dear One!

Paula (SweetPea) said...

Oh, Lelia, I just fall in love with your family every time I read more. You had tears rolling down my eyes when Alivia said "That's okay mom at least I got to skate." That IS the MOST precious thing.

Then, you/she had me laughing when she was looking for your sister's dog Gracie.

The mind of a child. I love the conversation you and she had in Target. Actually, what a blessing it is for her at such a young age to know there's a proper and improper way for women (AND men) to reveal/show themselves.

Although, I was a little confused if she was referring to your choice of clothing (since you zipped up your jacket) or if she was referring to some incidences in which her eagle eyes has seen some bathroom or bedroom scenes.

You have so blessed me today.

I think your target conversation shows that Alivia HAS her dream in which has taught her to know about modesty and unmodesty :-) love her choice of words.

I re-read her words of you being naked in front of Daddy and that just makes me smile. Wonder how she thinks she was created! :-) Like I said, the mind of a child is SO precious.

Thanks so much for sharing this. It really has warmed my heart.
Love ya much,

Laurie Ann said...

Truly priceless, Leila. Chidlren are amazing. Amazing with a capital A. (And they miss nothing!)

I wanted to let you know I'm sorry I had to drop out of the study. Things got crazy in life - work went wild, my sister had a baby, we were spending lots of time babysitting and spending time with our grandson, Steve's dad had surgery, and then my dad had a pacemaker put in. I am still reading the book, though! It's awesome! I just haven't had time to post on it.

Anonymous said...

well you have misted up my eyes again with your story!

I would love to meet you face to face someday but Alivia MUST be there too--she is just a treasure!!

hugs from PA

Runner Mom said...

Don't you just love those babies and their wisdom and grace??? Another perfect gift from God!

Love you!

Paula said...

That is a great story to share, and congratulations on obviously teching her well enough to know what is acceptable and not. The only treasure I got this week from my cherub was an, "Ewww, that's yucky" when she saw a photo of my sweetie and I giving each other a quick peck on the lips in a photo! How that will change as she gets older! I must hit you up for parenting tips too, as you obviously have it down! Have a great Friday evening my friend, In Him, Paula :-)

HIS Daughter said...

That was precious, Lelia. You are the "perfect" Mom. Even through the tears as I type this, I know that no matter, our children need to love us.
I "dropped the basket" with my 17 year old and 19 year old in 2003. They would never trust me nor their Dad, nor anyone ever again.
GOD retored our marriage and together we walk out grace before them everyday.
Even older hearts need to learn to trust those they NEED to love.
You are doing it right. You are doing it with GOD'S grace and mercy!
Blessings and praying for you,

Anonymous said...

You are gorgeous! And that kid of yours!!! The things they say, hah! Sometimes you've just gotta right it down... have you started that scrapbook yet!!! Too priceless.

Anonymous said...

Oh, crumbs. 'Write', I meant 'write' - where's the correction fluid!!! Now, where's my thinking cap!!!...

Carol said...

You had me crying then laughing out loud. This was priceless. Too funny.

HisPrincess said...

Alivia has the Mum of her dreams. I'm sure she wouldn't dream of having you any other way.

Amy L Brooke said...

I agree, Alivia already has the mom of her dreams. I'm glad she already knows how to show grace.

I've finally done a real post! That means I'm feeling better!

Kimberly said...

Girl, you may not know Kung Fu, but you can kick the devil's tail ANY day! You are one awesome momma who loves the Lord and loves your family! Your sweetie is so blessed to have you, even if you have time issues! :) I have time issues, too! This is quite distressing to my man as he works for FedEx! :)

You are a blessing...even if you are unmodest! hee hee
Love you!
K :)

Sita said...

I so appreciate how both you and Lysa literally 'work out your salvation' on screen, in fron of everyone, letting us in on what God allowed in your life this day and then filtering it (however 'unmodest') through His eyes to receive His lesson and sharing it with I have told you before, very much like David!
And by the way, I agree with Kim, those Kung Fu experts have nothing on you, Woman!

Heather@Mommymonk said...

Oh my, Lelia, you have had a lot of things going on in your life right now. Don't be too hard on yourself for getting the times wrong (I do it all the time and I have no good excuse!) What a sweet girl to not fuss over missing most of the skating party. Hope things go smoothly for you this week as you try to juggle it all! :)