Bright Future

ALYSSA SUE

Seems like just yesterday you were just a little girl and now you are a grown young woman. When people say "time flies", it really does. Since you were Amiyah's age over 6,000 days and nights have passed. Where has the time gone?

It's as if you went from this

To this overnight, not 6,570 nights....


You know Dad and I love you more than words can describe and that's one thing God has blessed me with is the ability to express what's in my heart and put it into written words; however watching my first love graduate from high school has left me struggling to find the right words.

Back in August when we found out you were pregnant I have to admit at that moment in time I was unable to see any light in your future. What I could see was struggle, heart ache, shattered goals and dreams that would never be lived out. Throughout your pregnancy God was gracious and showed me little glimpses of hope that you were going to be just fine, but it wasn't until April 9th that I saw the brightest light ever as you held your baby girl for the first time. I knew at that moment that your future was brighter than ever. I love this picture when your Grandpa handed her to you moments after you had her (the date on the picture is wrong). I love how you you started crying as you looked at her.

You both are so precious and what a picture of love...

Just like I did years ago, you too have chosen to not take the typical path that an 18 year old takes after high school. As your friends change their address and move away to attend college, you'll be changing diapers and attend school in town. Although life is different, having Amiyah in your life should motivate you even more to set goals and achieve them.

My biggest prayer for you right now is that you will surrender your heart completely to God like you did at the age of 9. When you invited Christ into your life it was out of response of being chased by Him.

Let Him get you Alyssa.

Fall into His arms again and let your life become His.

He has such big plans for your life, but you know He must have your cooperation.

I love everything about you and am so proud of the young lady you have become. Seek the Lord with all your heart, mind, soul and strength Alyssa Sue because He will never leave you nor forsake you. He adores you more than Dad and I ever could and our love for you is enormous.

With the high school drama laid to rest you are now stepping into a new world. Bills, budgets, schedules, juggling school work and a job all while having sleepless nights comforting the cries of your newborn.

Instead of frustration choose determination

Instead of chaos choose a plan

Instead of drama choose peace

Instead of the world choose God

You have everything great before you. A bright future is within your grasp and with God all things are possible. The only difference between before August 12th, the day you found out of your pregnancy and after April 9th, the day you welcomed your little girl into this crazy world is that now you're dreaming for two. IF you choose to take on your future without taking God's hand then the road will be very bumpy and full of regret. Trust me, I know this because I chose the hard way so many times and it wasn't fun. Seek God Lyss and in the book of Jeremiah it says that He will be found. THAT honey, is a life choice you will never regret. Trust me, I know this too.

Dream big Baby Girl, but ask God for guidance, strength and get curious to find out what the plans He has in store for you are. In the book of Isaiah we are told that His ways are not our ways and our thoughts are not even close to what He's thinking.

Don't leave God out of your future.

Give Him complete control of your life and watch Him show off the majestic ways of how He does things.

He will take you to your knees in complete awe.

When airplanes are getting ready to take off, the passengers have to listen to the instructions they're given. They have to put their seat belts on and put their trust in their pilot. You are on the flight of your life right now getting ready to take off to a new destination. Will you choose to trust your Pilot and give God your heart completely or will you try to plan your own trip?

Trust in Him Lyss and He'll take you and Amiyah places that are better than you could ever imagine.

Allow God to surprise you sweetheart.

Dad and I adore you and love you so much. We were so proud of you when you walked across that stage last week and received your diploma. You are beyond beautiful inside and out and I am blessed to call you my daughter.

Above: Alyssa(R) with best friend Courtney.

HAPPY GRAD!

I love you...

Mom

xoxo

Slow Beginnings

Okay, last night I went to my 1st meeting/workout to learn how to become a runner. There were over 300~mostly women that showed up. I loved it because there were ALL types of people there which erased all my insecurities. I didn't even care that I didn't have on a cute running outfit as there was this one guy who wore jeans and a belt to run in.

They gave us some great tips and then we were split into groups.
I have not run forever and yet when they announced the groups I almost chose the one I could have handled in high school (pre-hip pointer) which was run for 4 minutes/walk for 1 and repeat too many times for me. Realizing 4 minutes would really feel like 45 once I got out on the path I stayed put for the next group.

They announced the next two groups to choose from would either run for 2 minutes/walk for 1 OR run for 30 seconds/walk for 30 seconds for a total of 20 minutes. I confidently moved forward with the 2 minute runners and off we went.

I have to be honest with you, I almost died. 120 seconds is SO long people!! I can't believe they don't have ambulance people with oxygen masks ready to assist you. They only had high school girls handing out H2O and words of encouragement.

So there Lelia was running her heart out in public behind the man in jeans and a belt. Did I mention I was running up hill? My group quickly became little dots as they left me behind. No problem, I'll just run with the next group of 2 minute runners. No loyalty. They left me behind too.

Okay Lelia, join the next group. I let a few of them pass me and then I snuck into the pack unnoticed. We went for a mile then headed back to the school to stretch.

Okay, so maybe I was a little over confident in thinking I could actually run for 2 minutes straight. OR was I defeating myself with my thoughts. See, I know I'm totally capable of running for 2 minutes straight, I just let my mind take over with "I can't" thoughts. I allowed my mind to be flooded with negative thinking and I found myself running 1 minute/walking 5 minutes. I know I didn't give a 100% last night and God let me know it.

On the last stretch back to home base my body wanted to run and my mind was talking it out of doing such a thing. That's when the two ladies in front of me yelled, "oh look!" And what was ahead of Lelia booking it on the sidewalk?

Seriously Lord...of all things...a turtle? Something known for being slow and You place it in front of me "running" back to the pond on the side of the road?

I got the message and began to run. Downhill.

Out of 300 runners I waited a second and locked arms with the two ladies I had passed at the very end and we walked in together saying next week we'll run farther.

Here I had prayed for God to help me....He directs me to this running clinic for beginning wanna be's and I whine the whole time. So he sent Mr. Turtle to let me know that being lazy will get me no where! I have to move if I want any results to show.

So, next week I will do better mentally and give more effort physically. I did run a lot of it, but I know that I could have done better. And next week when I pass the turtle he'll think I'm a rabbit because of how fast I'll be moving!

So next week my approach will be different:

Positive thoughts and jeans and a belt for my attire.

Hey, it worked for him as he had already stretched and was getting in his car as I was just crossing the finish line.

Thanks for your prayers.

~Many Blessings~

Here is my "homework" until my next meeting next Wednesday. I'm going to do group two. Remember each week increases until at the end of the 8 weeks group 1 is running for 15 minutes and group 2 is running 3 miles. Oh Lord the thought of that...If you want to join me, just pick your group, get off the couch and let's do this thing!

#1: 30 second runners

Friday: Run 30 sec/Walk 30 sec x 20 min

Saturday: Run 1 min/Walk 1 min x 25 min.

Monday: Run 30 sec/Walk 30 sec x 20 min.

Wednesday: Run 30 sec/Walk 30 sec x 20 min.

#2 Two minute runners

Friday: Run 2 min/Walk 1 min (do this 8 times)

Saturday: Run 3 min/Walk 1 min (do this 8 times)

Monday: Run 2 min/Walk 1 min (do this 8 times)

Wednesday: Run 2 min/Walk 1 min (do this 8 times)

Here are some tips they shared with us:

An hour before running you should eat 200 calories~nothing heavy and drink lots of water throughout your day. They had cold orange slices and bananas for us afterward. Good shoes are important and they suggest buying them at a runner's store and after a run or at the end of the day and take the socks you'd wear with them.

C'MON NOW, IF A TURTLE CAN DO THIS SO CAN WE!

6 year old for sale

Tonight at 7pm I will officially become reinstated as an athlete. I will lace up my tennis shoes and will attempt to learn how to run properly instead of looking like I'm running in pain or from something.

I have had many "what the heck am I doing" moments over this last week. I mean c'mon, running?

When I was in high school and Spring would roll around I dreaded when the bell would ring at 3:30 and I had to go dress for track. Volleyball...loved it, basketball...played it, track...hated it. Our school was out in the country and we didn't have a track so we had to run telephone poles for our practice...oh my goodness I was so happy when the doctor told me I had a hip pointer and couldn't participate anymore.

Here's the definition of a hip pointer in case you don't know:

The hip pointer is a contusion or deep bruise to the bone called the iliac crest. This is the bone you feel at the top of your hips on either side. The athlete with a hip pointer experiences instant pain and disability.

Rejoicing with an ice pack on my hip over the diagnosis of a hip pointer goes to show just how much I despised the sport of running. Just seemed so pointless as I ran from telephone pole to telephone pole only to end up back in the school parking lot completely exhausted.

So I just have to ask myself twenty years after being a track drop out:

Self, what are you doing?

I need your prayers sisters. At 7pm tonight I need to be given the ability to soar on wings like eagles and run and not grow weary, and of course walk and not be faint. So if you could just pray Isaiah 40:31 over me tonight that would be fantastic.

As you may have read in my post Thick Truth, my 6 year old Alivia motivated me even after I read her entry to her 1st grade teacher and she described me as being white and thick. My husband has dark skin and so my kids who are bi-racial have the advantage of an instant tan. All year. It's just so unfair in the summer because no matter how much color I think I've added to my skin tone, according to my roommates, I'm still pale.

Just as my confidence starts to rise it plummeted a little after yesterday. I had Alivia here at work with me since summer vacation has begun. Suddenly she came running into my office and picked up the phone off the other desk. She had a note pad with a phone number she had written on it. I of course asked her who she was calling as she began to dial. With much excitement and as serious as she could be she hung up the phone and just like her Daddy started talking with her hands as she said:

"Mom, I just saw this on TV and I want to buy it for you. It's a super shaver and you can shave your arms, legs (she's pointing to every body part), your underarms, your lip and your chin. I want to get this for you. It's only $19.99."

Trying to comprehend all she just told me, I tried to tell her I was fine, paranoid now, but fine with my 2 dollar tweezers at home, but she was insistent. Later while I was trying to balance the company check book I was unaware she had come back in my office and got back on the phone until I heard her say, "Oh man, I only have 10 minutes to order this!" I assume the infomercial told her if she ordered the Tweeze within 10 minutes she could get it for $9.99!

SOOOOOOO...my 6 year old has innocently given me a complex. I don't know if a beginner's running clinic can help me at all now because apparently being thick is the least of my problems.

If we have to do introductions tonight how does this sound...

"Hello, my name is Lelia. I am 37. I am white, thick and I have a hairy chin and I sport a mustache. I'm glad to be here."

I'm sure I'll have many begging to be my running partner.

Anyway, every Thursday starting tomorrow, I'll share with you what I learn on Wednesday night and will give you the homework they give us. Yes, I'll actually be given running assignments to do in between our meeting times each Wednesday. Remember, this is for beginner's so they teach us how to work up to a mile, two miles, etc.

Those who want to join me this summer...we can do this!

Oh, and did I mention there is a 6 year old for sale on e-bay?

She's a life coach that will tell you like it is and motivate the heck out of you or make you feel like hiding. You can find her right next to the Tweeze she thinks I need...

~Many Blessings~

Yes to God reality

Hello Ladies!

Isn't unbelievable how many "reality" shows are on TV now?

It always strikes me as funny how women on shows like the Bachelor feel "special" after her man has kissed on 25 other women to find out that she's the one. Then the proposal's of marriage after a few weeks of drama crack me up.


Then of course the Big Brother show where you put a bunch of crazies in one house together with cameras everywhere watching their every move. I get paranoid if a spider is watching me spend time with my husband, I can't imagine having the world see us.


Now we have a cooking show with a mean chef, a search for the Idol of the US of A and even a show where you can Swap your wife for another. Oh boy...where is this world coming to?

You want reality?

Come live with me for a week. I'll show you how it is to live with a teen mom who knows all about everything, a teen son who I have to reach up to slap the back of his head when he back talks, a 6 year old who is queen of drama, a husband who is home recovering from back surgery and has drowned out my quiet mornings with the sound of ESPN and a Mom who thinks living in a mental hospital might just be her next address.

Even though AI is the only one that keeps my attention, here is a little something I wrote about the show Survivor....

Dear Jesus,
Every channel on TV has a reality show
It’s amazing what people will do for dough
If a real survivor is what they want to be
Then they should come and live a week with me
I’m sorry but waking up on an island it seems
Would be covering pretty much all of my dreams
Survival is trying to make true everyone’s dinner wish
It’s not about swimming in the ocean with fish
I feel I survive after breaking up sibling fights
It’s not anything about gaining immunity rights
Survival is loving each other no matter what
Being a survivor isn’t about building a hut
Survival is about keeping your marriage vows
It’s not about eating the brains of dead cows
Survival is keeping a teenager out of danger
It’s not about having an alliance with a stranger
Survival is about fixing hearts when they’re broken
It’s nothing about if the tribal council has spoken
Oh Lord, thank you for helping me to see
That without you a survivor I would never be
Amen
© 2005 Lelia Chealey

Proverbs 13:9
The light of the righteous shines brightly, but the lamp of the wicked is snuffed out.

Scripture taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®
Copyright©1973, 1978, 1984 International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.

~Many Blessings~

Don't forget to get a copy of the book,

"What Happens When Women Walk in Faith" by Lysa TerKeurst.

Starting July 1st I will host the study of this book. We will read one chapter a week and do the study. I will post on it on Tuesday's then have Mr. Linky so that you can link your blog and post on what God has shown you also. So excited!! A few of you already have your books and are ready to go. The last Yes to God Tuesday study was amazing...I can't wait! So mark your calendar for Tuesday, July 1st and invite a friend!

Have the intro and chapter 1 read and the study at the end of chapter 1 done by Tuesday, July 1st so we can start our discussion right away! That's one thing I love about Lysa's studies...they are perfect for the busy woman.

Love ya!

Thick Truth

Normally I don't post back to back, but some things are just too good to not share.

Back in "the day", you know like 20 years ago, I strutted my athletic frame down the halls of my high school, never having a thought that one day my many hours spent pumping iron and doing aerobic videos led by Jane Fonda would be hidden.

Never did I think that once a year at my annual physical exam I'd leave my doctor's office with a sheet of paper with the words "slightly obese" scribbled on it attached to a pamphlet of healthy tips.

When I voice my "I can't believe I let myself get like this" woes, my sweet friends try their best to comfort me with words like, "well, you have had three kids Lelia"; only to hear me desperately trying to remind them of the nice shape I had after I gave birth to Alyssa and Aaron.

And what is up with slightly obese...I'm either tipping the scale in the wrong direction or I'm not...there's no 'slight' about it.

It wasn't until before I got pregnant with Alivia in 2000 that I began to gain weight and only a few times over the last 6 years have I lost more than just water weight where people actually noticed. Over the years though I have not had long term success and have only "slightly" kept the weight off for a season.

I recently took a poll to prove to my husband that I'm not alone when it comes to doing things like eating frosting out of a can, indulging in raw cookie dough and pouring Hershey's syrup into my mouth. I suppose I do have some habits that send my husband into disgust mode and may just contribute to my weight problem. Gene can scarf down a whole bag of Chilli Cheese Fritos between commercials, but the man would never think of getting a spoon and eating Pillsbury Creamy Supreme Milk Chocolate frosting out of the can. Never. This is not a habit I do a lot, but when I do, he is quick to let me know that in the future my complaints about having to shop in the plus size department will be falling on his deaf ears.

Anyway, at the beginning of May I remembered this annual running clinic, but I was unable to find any information on it. Recently I was in a boutique when the sales girl started telling me about an upcoming clinic called Beginner's Luck. Just so happened that it is the same clinic I had been searching for. So,on Mother's Day after eating a waffle cone filled with peanut butter ice cream from Cold Stone, I took myself downtown to the Running Company store and picked up my registration form. Last week I filled out my form in hope of a better future and mailed it in along with my 20 buck commitment.

So, starting Wednesday, June 4th I will be in a beginner's running club that will meet for 8 weeks for an hour each evening. I will be taught the how to's of running properly so people driving by me don't slow down and ask if I'm okay.

I'll be taught how to put a whole can of frosting on a cake instead of in my mouth and choose to eat fruit instead.

I will be taught what running shoes are best for my feet instead of which shoes I think are the prettiest.

Then at the end of the 8 weeks we're encouraged to enter a 5K (3 mile) race in the Cornhusker State Games in July.

I CAN DO THIS!!

Just this past weekend the doubt was sinking in and the excuses started invading my mind as I was thinking of my new adventure.

Thoughts such as...

How I hate running,

How it might be hot and I'll sweat. A lot.

How I love frosting.

How I really want the body I had when I walked to my locker to get my Algebra books in the 80's.

Is it too late to get refunded my twenty dollar registration fee...

But just as I started to allow the excuses to snag my focus, God sent me a little reminder that this healthy lifestyle change is just the boost I need.

I need this weekly accountability group that has no desire to become like Bruce Jenner who I stared at every morning while eating my bowl of Wheaties when I was a teen athlete.God knows I need to be a part of this group of people who do not have the goal of running a marathon, but instead work their way up to running 3 miles by the end of the summer. People who want to run for pleasure and health.
So in typical God fashion, He sent me this last night...

Since tomorrow is the last day of school, my 6 year old daughter Alivia is cleaning out her desk and brought home her writing journal. I love reading what she writes and my face lit up like a Christmas tree when I saw the journal entry from May 6th titled

"My Mom".

Let me share...

My mom's name is Lelia. She is 37. My mom is white.

She is thick. My mom has brown and red hair.

WHOA! WAIT ONE MINUTE...DID SHE WRITE "THICK"???

My mom is THICK?

Not only am I white, but I am thick??

I lovingly smiled at the sweet child before me who just made herself a present-less birthday girl this July and I continued to read...

My mom and I like to read and go to the park. My mom and I like to ride our bikes and play at the library. We like to go the movies and the zoo to spend time together. She likes to write on her blog. She likes to talk on the phone. I love my mom she is very pretty. I love spending time with her. I hope you have learned alot about my mom.

On the way to church last night my 13 year old son Aaron was reading this touching journal entry out loud while laughing. He was quick to point out that he can't remember the last time he even saw me on a bike.

I guess Alivia's fantasy "in-shape mom" got mixed up with the real thing as she told her brother that some of it is "pretend".

I just said, "But Aaron, look how active she made me look to her teacher ....I go to the park and I play at the library!"

"Yeah, but you're thick." said the not so smart son with a birthday only two weeks away.

So while it is nice to save money on my children's birthday's and according to my poll, prove to Gene that I'm not alone in eating this...

I am now convinced that God wants me to eat these instead...

And also so that when my little Princess writes about me next year in 2nd grade, the description of me won't have to be filled with fake activities and won't cause her teacher to wonder when she sees me at Parent/Teacher conferences...

if she's so active then why is she so thick?

So next Wednesday consider yourself warned that between 7 and 8pm central time you will not be feeling an earthquake. It will just be a washed up athlete trying to run off her thickness here in the Midwest.


Weird that seeing "slightly obese" for 6 years written by my Doctor didn't get me motivated, but seeing the description"thick" written out in 1st grade hand writing did the trick...

Here's to my soon-to-be-gone thickness,

Here are the poll results. Gene got such a kick out of this and I proved that his wife is not the only one out here that does these things...Thanks for participating!

Yes, I eat frosting out of a can...37 admitted to doing this

Yes, I have eaten Hershey's Syrup directly out of the can...19 of us!

Yes, I have eaten more raw cookie dough than I've baked...27 in-the-closet cookie dough eaters!

No, your husband is right, you are gross and need help...1 vote...Probably Gene. :)

Blessing in the middle of crazy

The demands of daily life can be just so overwhelming.

Sometimes we can feel like we're getting pulled in many directions.

Somedays we feel like we accomplish nothing.

Here's a picture of what is laying on top of my desk at work just waiting for me...

But here is what is on top of the other side of my desk just waiting for me..

Sound asleep in her bouncy seat on my desk in the middle of phone calls, billing statements and wondering what to cook for dinner...

Isn't life good?

In the middle of this crazy life, don't forget to kiss the cheeks of those you love.

~Many Blessings~

If you haven't already, don't forget to participate in the poll upper right hand corner for I so value your input :) and also read yesterday's post about the new YES to GOD study beginning July 1st!

YES to God during PMS?

I want to continue the Tuesday's YES to GOD because I enjoyed studying and discussing Lysa TerKeurst's book so much with you all. So much that on Tuesday, July 1st I will be hosting a discussion on her book/Bible study...

"What Happens When Women Walk in Faith?"

So...plenty of time to purchase the book and you can do that by clicking here and buy it directly from Proverbs 31 Ministries or wherever you can find it. Don't forget to mark your calendar to meet here on Tuesday, July 1st to grow with God, learn from each other and walk in faith! I can hardly wait to see what God teaches us! Don't forget to invite a friend with or without a blog. Also, I e-mailed Lysa last week letting her know we finished her book and how incredible it was. Here is part of her response and just wanted to share it with you..."I am working fast and furious on my next book. I'd love for you and the gals from your study to pray for me." Let's not forget to lift our fellow sister in Christ up to the Lord as she's working on her next assignment from Him!


I do want to continue meeting here on Tuesdays for YES to GOD discussions up until July 1st. I was originally going to discuss a characteristic of the fruit of the Spirit each week, but with all the stuff I have going on in June I thought better of it. Too detailed for my calendar right now, but wanted to do something fun anyway. Back in 2005 I wrote a series of poems on issues or things that women primarily deal with. Starting today, I will be posting one of those poems and feel free to give your story, advice, what God has taught you in this area....just whatever you want to share. Hope you enjoy it and I hope it's a fun way to kick off the summer. I believe God has a great sense of humor and loves it when we laugh together.

So here we go...

Dear Jesus,

The first thing I should do today
Is take the time to kneel and pray
I know that I am not always nice
I’m definitely not made of sugar and spice
Just yesterday I had a bad PMS attack
I showed no mercy and I cut no slack
My husband couldn’t do anything right
The kids laid low and kept out of my sight
Everyone tries to stay out of my path
So not to become a victim of my wrath
It’s the smallest things that set me off
My poor family is afraid to move or cough
But the good news is that it’s a new day
My goal is to be kinder in all I do and say
Please help my children and my mate
To forgive me and give me a clean slate
Today I feel my attitude has changed
I don’t feel the slightest bit deranged
But just in case my PMS demon wins
Please pre-forgive me for all of my sins

~Amen~
©2005 Lelia Chealey

*Please participate in my poll on the top right side of my blog. Thank you!*

Live today for Christ,

Interrupted death

In June of 2002 my Grandmother Lelia got very sick. We took her to the hospital on Saturday afternoon, she was admitted, the doctor removed 3lbs of fluid from her lungs and all was well, so we thought. My mom, her brother and I spent the night with her that night. Her pulse was low and her breathing sporadic. Suddenly she had taken a turn for the worst, and by the next day all of her doctors agreed that she had 3 to 24 hours to live. Everyone gathered around her bedside to say their goodbyes.

Didn't matter what the doctors predicted, God wasn't finished with her yet as He so boldly proved that He is the only One who knows how many days we are given on this earth. On Monday, we brought her home so if she was to die she'd be surrounded by familiarity instead of cold hospital walls. She was on hospice for about a day when the family decided to put her on regular home health care with us doing most of the care. My Mom took off two months of work to care for her and spent her nights and days helping her almost 80 year old Dad take care of her dying Mom. We began to have weekly family dinners with Grandma watching us as she lay in her rented hospital bed set up in the middle of the living room and she savored every minute of it. Everyone did their part and Grandma was daily surrounded with much love and laughter. Grandma's diet was changed, she began a regular exercise routine and soon the doctor's notes said, "She is a miracle." We actually have a copy of his notes and her story of God's healing was so amazing that the local newspaper and TV station did a story on her calling her "Miracle on Sewell Street".

My Grandma would be known for her love for her family or the game of Bingo before being known that she loved Jesus Christ, but when she was sick, whoever gathered around her she made sure to tell them that they had to know Jesus. She was insistent that we have Him in our life. Her grand kids and my Grandpa heard her often say, "you just have to believe" as she shared how He had saved her. There was a different kind sweetness I had never seen in her before.

She wanted to hear "Amazing Grace" all of the time. All the grandkids chipped in and we gave her a beautiful wooden music box that plays Amazing Grace and has some of the words etched in the top of the heart shaped lid. She would listen to it constantly and always had it displayed on the table next to her chair. Her TV stayed off and when she wasn't sleeping she was either listening to or engaging in conversation with loved ones. She suddenly wanted to attend church with our family and cried when the worship band just happened to sing her song the first Sunday she went.

Six short years later, times have changed.

The only family dinners we have are on Thanksgiving and Christmas. She has gained back much of the weight she lost. She stopped exercising and now uses a walker to get around the house. We stopped asking her to go to church because her excuses outweigh her need to go. Her music box is covered with newspapers and she is back to watching hours of soap operas and reading cheap paperback romance books to fill her time.

Jesus being the center of her grand kids lives is not a voiced concern anymore.

Isn't it just weird that we can forget what God has done for us?

Like the doctors marked my Grandma dead within 24 hours, we all have a death sentence on our life unless we have accepted Christ into our life. When we do, we become God's miracle as He gives us new life. New breath. A new beginning. I know from experience those times I've strayed from God, that the few weeks after my reunion with Him are some of the sweetest. I want to tell everyone about Him just like my Grandma did. I want to worship Him, sing about Him and talk about Him.

Then at some point I invite complacency to settle in my life, and soon He's not the topic of my conversations. I'm not so picky about what movies I rent. The candle of excitement I had lit inside my heart for corporate worship on Sunday is suddenly blown out. One on one time with God isn't a desired adventure anymore, it's a rushed burden into my busy schedule until eventually my Bible needs to dusted.

Jesus being the center of my life is not a concern anymore.

How do we prevent this from happening in our walk with God?

When Gene takes Alivia somewhere he tells her to hold his hand. He wants to keep her safe from getting hit by a car as we walk in a parking lot or separated from us if we're in a crowd. For the most part she obeys, but there are times when he has had to be stern with her little independent self and demand that she holds his hand. When she is hand in hand with him he knows right where she is and he is able to protect her. She is by his side or even a little behind him, but when she's close he is aware of her presence as she is aware of his. She goes where he goes.When Alivia is listening to her father's instruction and holding Gene's hand, nothing can separate her from her Daddy.

Let's avoid becoming a forgetful, complacent Christian and keep hold of our Savior's hand. For when we're close to Him we are aware of His presence and are under His protection. Be in His Word daily and listen to His instruction so that nothing can separate us from our Heavenly Father.

Let's go where He goes.

~Live today for Christ~

The God who gives & takes away...we praise You!

This morning after watching my parents officially adopt my 4 year old brother Joe who has been in their home since he was 2, I read an e-mail requesting prayer for a family from my friend Kelley at Aroma of Joy.

Steven Curtis Chapman, well known Christian artist lost his little 5 year old adopted daughter, Maria yesterday. We need to lift this family up to our God who knows our days on this earth. As one family in Nebraska is celebrating the addition in their family of an adopted child, another family in Tennessee is mourning the loss in their family of an adopted child. Both gifts from God, one given and one taken.


I would guess that Maria was a believer in the Jesus that she heard spoken of and heard her Daddy sing of often in their home. Now she is face to face with the Savior we blog about, read about, worship and love. Can you even begin to imagine what this little girl is experiencing as you read this? Brought home from China to the parents God had picked out for her back in the days when Moses' roamed the earth and now brought to her eternal home. If she thinks the homecoming was fantastic when the Chapman's brought her home I can only imagine what welcome she received yesterday.

Thanks Kelley for the call to pray for this hurting family as we only hope their walk with God deepens to a depth they didn't even know existed. May this tragedy strengthen their walk and make their love for you even stronger. Please also pray for their teenage son that accidentally ran her over in the driveway as the family witnessed it. May he find strength in You on his knees as the enemy tries to defeat him with guilt. So hard to comprehend this kind of thing Lord, but may the Chapman family only draw closer to You. As Steven has blessed us with his music over the many years, may we bless You and him and his family by lifting their needs up to You today. And though our understanding of tragedy in the midst of the Chapman's celebrating an engagement and a graduation may we trust in You.


Click here to leave a message for the Chapman family on a blog specifically set up in memory of Maria Sue Chapman.

Now meet heaven's sweet addition...





Make today count for Christ,

Week 9: Tuesday YES to GOD study

Better late then never right? Sorry about the delay.

OH my goodness our nine weeks of reading and discussing Lysa TerKeurst's book, "What Happens When Women Say Yes to God" has come to an end today. This has been nine weeks of God getting hold of my heart and giving me the desire to say YES to Him. I've gotten to know so many incredible women of God and have really been blessed with your testimonies of how great our God is. Okay, here we go...remember that words in blue are from the book.

CHAPTER 9: Radically Blessed

We can't pursue the radically obedient life and still continue to flirt with disobedience in certain areas of our life. We can't be both red and green toward God at the same time. It gets us nowhere. It's confusing. It's dangerous.

Oh wow! Lysa could not have written that anymore clearer for us. We can't have both God and the world. Just can't. Doesn't mix like oil and water doesn't. We either will live for Him or not. I love that God wants our whole hearts and won't settle for anything less than that. Those last three sentences in blue describes life to a tee when trying to fight your heart desire to live for the Lord. When we try to fight against the life that our hearts wants us to lead we are left confused, risking everything for nothing and not going anywhere. Scary place to be in. I know, I've been there, done that.

I loved how Lysa addressed all of our excuses for not saying YES to God.

1.) Not able...Christ's power is made perfect in our weakness!

2.) Make mistakes...Grace will shown to us!

3.) Bad mood or feeling rebellious...choice!

Obey based on your decision to obey, not on your ever-changing feelings.

Lysa also reminds us to ask God for help with keeping the desire to be obedient. We have a God who listens to us and will respond to our cries of help.

PRAY!!!

He will help us to want to obey Him and will give us His power to do so.

Listen closely to what Lysa says here: lasting obedience must be born out of desire, not duty. I just read a blog today that really hit on this. My blog friend Tracy tells a beautiful story of caring for her husband's aged aunt. God showed her that He is all that she and her husband needed in the times they got tired of tending to his aunt's needs. Click here to read it for yourself as God's reminder was sent to them just as their caretaking was becoming duty.

Lysa wraps the book up by telling us that if we choose to live a life of radical obedience to whatever God asks of us then we will be living a life that is...

ADVENTUROUS

NOT A WASTE

WORRY-FREE FOR OUR FUTURE

NOT WORN OUT

SEEING OTHERS THROUGH GOD'S EYES

BLESSED WITH AN ETERNAL PERSPECTIVE

and last but not least we will live a life that is

CHANGING THE WORLD!

Now what woman in her right mind doesn't want that kind of life?

This book has really been a life changer for me.

My Grandparents own a Garbage company. They have two huge trucks and about 3,000 customers. Everyday Monday through Friday the crew picks up the trash that people don't want. People leave bags of junk out at the curb and our guys pick it up, throw it in the truck and run the blades. The blades crush the garbage so they can make room for more garbage. When the hopper is full, they drive to the dump and empty their trucks so the next day they can collect more trash.

What if my Grandpa decided he didn't want his sons to dump the garbage out of their trucks? What if he decided that he wanted them to keep everything they collected? If he did this, he wouldn't have a successful company because he wouldn't have room enough to haul every one's trash. He can't have it both ways. He can't tell his customers that he will haul their garbage for them and then keep it. To run a successful business he has to let my uncles dispose of the garbage at the landfill.

Same thing with us.

We cannot be a woman walking God while we are having an affair. We can't pray for our friends then get on the phone and mask our gossip as a prayer request.

Bottom line is that we can't be the garbage hauler and collector at the same time. We either dump the garbage and live for Jesus or keep the garbage and live a life full of confusion, danger and missing out on the plans God has for us.

I hope this book allowed God to reach a depth of your heart you didn't even know existed. I have grown so much during these last nine weeks I am just amazed at my Father. At the beginning of this study I was hit hard with some situations I had no control over. Husband's surgery and a granddaughter born in the same week just about drove this control freak out of state. Did I fail in how I reacted? You bet. Was I shown grace? More than I deserved, but this whole facing trials and living life under pressure has brought me so much closer to God. So close that I don't want to return to where I was just a week ago.

These last few weeks I have been so weepy with God. Not "boo-hoo", but overwhelmed at just the thought of Him. I want more of Him. I want to live my life completely for Him. I want to believe that what He has up His holy sleeve is so much more than I could ever imagine. I want HIM to be evident in my life to those who have no idea who He is and desire Him by the time we part ways. Oh friends He has to be EVERYTHING. Let's stop chasing the nothings in the world and start chasing the God who parted the Red Sea, raised Lazarus from the dead, turned the wine into water, walked on water and left the disciples breathless when He left the tomb empty.

He wants us. All of us. Let's give in and let Him have His way with us! Allow yourself to be used by Him for His glory.

Using unworthy women with a past seems to be His specialty...I know because I am one that just wants to say YES!

Please post your comments below and if you have a blog and have more to share...sign up under Mr. Linky. Also....my friend Rachel~please share what you have said Yes to God about in the comments section so we can have prayer warriors all over the nation for this Sunday.

Love you much,

*I will be continuing Tuesday's with looking at the fruit of the Spirit one by one beginning with one a week for the next 9 weeks.

Join me next Tuesday for more of saying YES to God beginning with a discussion about LOVE!

Galations 5:22

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.

Unwelcome guests

Friday night the kids and I were at my parents home. My Mom, my sister Michelle and I got to talking about the video that I put on my last post. The kids got curious so my Dad brought up his lap top and it was awesome to see the kids glued to it. I was thrilled that not only did my 2 teenagers understand the message, but my 6 year old got it as well. It would finish and the kids would say "play it again" so I think we watched it and talked about it at least 4 times. The coolest part was that Alyssa put it on her My Space afterward!!!! Lots of kids visit her space, so if you think of it, please pray.



That's one of the many things I love about God. He is the only One who knows what is stirring in my daughter's heart. The things she says sometimes just makes my heart skip a beat. For instance, I knew you all were praying for her when I let you know she was heading to the hospital to give birth to Amiyah and after Baby Girl was born Alyssa told me, "I don't know Mom, it was so weird. I wasn't scared or anything. It was like God just gave me peace during her birth." I think as a Mom I sometimes subconsciously judge my kids walk with Christ, or what I may view as a lack of. Meanwhile, Jesus is begging me to get out of His way because He's getting her back...even if it is just an inch here an there. He knows her heart belongs to Him, and I just need to keep praying and let Him work on her the way He knows how until she melts in His arms in complete surrender like she did at the age of nine.



Okay, so I was sitting at my computer the other morning when I heard a noise. Shhhhh I told myself. I actually did...out loud. We have a drop ceiling in the basement and the noise I heard was a mouse above my head scurrying about taunting me; knowing I couldn't get to him. I talked out loud to him anyway hoping my warning of a snapped neck in a trap would get his attention and he'd fearfully take his little gray self out of my house. He didn't though because a few nights later I heard him again.

See, around my house I don't play when it comes to uninvited guests. I don't like company that is sneaky, comes out only at night, destroys things I love and runs from me. I also don't like spiders and you cannot believe how many I've killed in my house as of late. One morning I even turned on my computer monitor to see 8 legs running across my monitor. His guts are still smeared across my screen in hopes that it will scare his family and friends off. The other night I ended up sleeping upstairs on the couch when as I was just about to crawl into bed I saw a big, mean looking tarantula on my bed spread. Okay, it was 50 times smaller than a tarantula, but even after knocking it to the ground and grinding it into the carpet, I couldn't make myself get under the covers.



What is the deal with a mouse and spiders trying to invade my home? Whenever I see something like a spider that doesn't belong here I verbalize how they picked the wrong home to crawl into, then they meet their death at the bottom of whatever shoe is closest.


So what if...when we recognize that something has entered our hearts that doesn't belong in it, we begin to speak out loud God's Word until it meets it's death.
For example...

GOSSIP
Psalm 39:1
I said, "I will watch my ways and keep my tongue from sin; I will put a muzzle on my mouth"

JEALOUSY
Hebrews 13:5
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."


Get the idea? It's not like I just wake up one morning and I have this sharp tongue. This happens over time as I let things, habits, movies, bad music, come into my home and heart. So why am I surprised when I snap at my husband or the kids with words full of regret? When I allow junk to manifest in my heart, eventually what is in my heart will come out of me through my speech. If I didn't take the life of each spider I see, eventually cobwebs would begin to form in the corner of each room, showing that the spider has taken up residence within my home. Same thing in my heart, if I don't let God's Word take out the unwanted then I will have cobwebs within my heart. It is so important that I monitor what I allow into my life.
Proverbs 4:23
Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

Okay, I'm off to cut a hole in my basement ceiling. They are drop ceilings but not the type that you can push up to get to the actual ceiling. The owner before us put in the type of ceiling in that if you push up a square out of its groove, it won't go back in place. It think the mouse knows this and that is why he is so brave to run around above me.

Anyway, I have my mouse trap ready to be put in place and I have recited my final speech to the rodent. Now I just need to figure out where to cut the hole in the ceiling so my husband Gene won't notice. Wish me luck so I can blog in peace.

~Many Blessings~

I choose Jesus

Years ago I was a very confused young woman. Raised up in a strong Christian home I became the Prodigal daughter much younger than what I should have. I attended a private Christian school and in my early teens became very rebellious. Not sure why I chose the path I did as both of my parents are God fearing in love with Jesus Christ, very loving people. I have nothing but great memories when it comes to my childhood and my actions literally broke my parents' hearts.

Something happened as a young teenager to where all of my choices were married to consequences that were not good. It was when I was in my early twenties and things were just horrible between Gene and I long before we were married. We both came from Christian homes but we were both clearly not living a life that reflected Jesus.

The sins were too numerous to even try to recall or even share on this blog as some things God hasn't given me the nudge to share. I secretly hope He never asks me to indulge in certain things of my past, but if He does I hope I'm obedient. Like today. I am saying "yes" to God when really I'd rather keep this in my back pocket. Someone must need to hear of His greatness is all the reasoning I can come up with.

I'll never forget the despair I felt on this one particular day. Gene was off on his own sinful adventure and I just couldn't take it anymore. I remember his roommate asking me if I was okay and begging me to not do anything stupid. I promised I wouldn't and said I was fine and went home. An empty heart and empty apartment is not a good combination.

Alyssa was out of town camping with my parents and I was scheduled to go to work in a few hours. I remember making the decision that I was done. Done with life. I felt like I was the worst mom in the world to Alyssa and honestly at that time in my life I was. I loved her, but I just put my selfish desires ahead of her needs...all of the time. I was just plain sick of me and I was so tired.

Growing up loving Jesus I was so far from Him because of the lifestyle I chose to live. I had praying parents and an Uncle and Aunt, Chris and Brenda in Alabama who refused to throw in the towel on me though. I believe that because of their faithfulness in praying over me that God heard their prayers. None of them knew what I was about to do, but I know now that God was not done with this child of His. He had more plans for me.

I emptied a bottle of sleeping pills into my mouth as I was in the shower. I got out and got dressed for work. Then I started feeling incredibly nautious. I then called my cousin and my aunt who live in town who I didn't ever call. I was telling them goodbye as I was holding a picture of Alyssa and through whatever I said to them they called 911.

I can only begin to imagine the victory dance Satan did when the pills slid down my throat. Little did he know my God was about to rise up and knock my pathetic enemy to the ground.

I was taken to the hospital in the nick of time and spent a few days recovering. Was life perfect after that? No way...I still didn't live my life for the Holy One who rescued me that day. And because He knows everything, He knew I'd still live life my way and yet He still got off His throne to save me. It wasn't until I returned to church a few years later and realized that Jesus wanted a personal relationship with me that I gave my life back to Him.

Blows my mind that God would want to use someone like me, but I'd rather be used by the Almighty One versus Satan any day. I want my life to reflect who I love by my actions and my words. Some days I know my husband has to wonder, but I am thankful God has blessed me with a man that has turned his life around and is filled with much grace. A man who desires to lead others to Christ because of how Jesus has changed his mind and heart.

We are a couple in love with Jesus. A couple who has looked at each other and thought..."really Lord this is your gift to me?". A couple who looks to the world like they're failing in the parenting area when their teens act like they haven't been taught a single thing except how to say "please and thank you" to his parole officer and to her OB doctor. A couple who knows if they return to living a life with their Bible's closed and their backs facing God that they will be destroyed by their enemy who is trying hard to get them back on his team again.

Bottom line is I have no idea where you have been or are heading to. Don't know if you're in love with Jesus or know nothing about Him. What I do know is that after watching this video my Mom sent me, I am reminded that He has to be everything to me. I know that when I wake up each morning I have to make a choice to live my life for Jesus as the center of my life. I tell you from my own personal nightmare that I have lived that a life out of my Savior's grasp is a scary road to travel.

I have to be close enough to feel His heart beating because when I'm not ,the only beating I feel is the one coming from Satan's fist.

Please take the time to watch this human video below...it is incredible. Thanks Mom for sending it my way.

~Many Blessings~

Don't Rush Recovery

Yesterday I drove Gene to Omaha for his first post-op check up with the surgeon and also physical therapy. He had an x-ray done and all 6 screws are in place doing what they're supposed to be doing. He had a fusion done so it's as if the doctor cemented his 2 bottom discs together. Makes me squirm just looking at my bionic man.

On the drive to Omaha Gene verbalized the questions he wanted to ask the doctor...

~Can I drive now?

~What can I do for exercise?

~Can I go back to work yet?

The doctor answered the back to work question without even being asked. NO. Come back in 6 weeks so we can see your progress. Back fusion surgery is some serious stuff and Gene has to be wise and listen to the surgeon's instruction so that he can heal properly. He was warned pre-op that if he didn't follow the post-op instructions that he may have to go back under the knife again. Even though he knew the recovery would be lengthy, he was still bummed that he couldn't return to a life without restrictions.

The other two questions he forgot to ask until we were checking out with the receptionist. So he headed back to the nurses' station to find the doctor and returned like a little boy in a candy store who was told to pick out whatever he wants.

YES. He can drive. He was so excited! As we were standing there he jokingly said, "Woman, I don't need you anymore." The two ladies sitting behind the desk just gasped and then started laughing as I nonchalantly told Gene to tie his shoes.

Still needs me.

My husband is an athlete and this lack of mobility and restraint on certain movement is just driving him crazy. He wants to be able to mow the lawn...now. He wants to return to his job...now. He wants to run on the treadmill...now. But after the surgeon looked at his x-rays and saw the inside of his body he said...not yet.

I think God does the same thing with us. He wants us to change so He performs the surgery on us and then gives us His post-op instructions through His Word. Sometimes I tend to get anxious during my recovery and I want to be trusted with things sooner than what God has in mind. If He gave me all that I wanted when I wanted it, I just may end up back on the surgery table.

Just like the x-rays gave Gene's doctor a view of his recovery progress, our Savior has a bird's eye view of our heart and what's in it. It's so important for us to check with the Surgeon first and see if our desires match up with His post-op plan for our life. Sometimes a "not yet" answer is for our own good.

Jeremiah 29:12-13

Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

God tells us that when we pray and seek Him with all our heart that we will be heard and He will be found. Gene wanted to drive home yesterday, but he sought out the doctor first and asked if it was okay before getting behind the wheel.

When God gives us a "yes" answer or even a "not yet" reply, because we sought Him first before we acted, we'll be just like Gene was yesterday when he drove me back to Lincoln...

filled with complete joy.

~Many Blessings~

Week 8: YES to GOD Tuesday Study

"What Happens When Women Say Yes to God" by Lysa TerKeurst has been incredible! We are on chapter 8 and next week will be our last chapter. I have enjoyed so much the faithfulness of your contributions and the testimonies and thoughts shared through the comments you've left here as well as on your own blogs. God is up to something in women of God and I feel so encouraged each week as I read Lysa's words in her book and then yours. I feel so honored to be able to host a table where we can come and sit together and not have one thing in common except our love for God and the desire of our hearts to say YES to Him. This has been a heck of a ride with each one of you and I love reading how God is showing up at the doorstep of your heart and your opening the door to Him. You all are such a blessing. Goodness, enough mushy talk, I feel like my son's dog Kane has just licked my face and I'm soaked in his slobber...smile...let's get started shall we? Remember, anything in blue is a quote from the book.


CHAPTER 8: GIVING UP WHAT WAS NEVER OURS

I really enjoyed the story Lysa started this chapter out with.

Summary:

Her daughter Hope received a ten-dollar bill as a birthday gift. Lysa and Hope were in the drive thru of a fast food place and after placing their lunch order, Lysa realized she was short on cash. She asked Hope to borrow the ten-dollars, Hope declined.

The reasoning of a 9 year old mind: she was looking forward to showing her friends the ten-dollar bill.

Lysa: Do you trust that I'll pay you back?

Hope: yes, but I want the ten-dollar bill, not 2 fives or 10 ones, just the ten.

As they neared the window to pay for the food Lysa tried everything to convince Hope to lend her the money.

I loved what Lysa wrote: She did not want a ten-dollar bill later because she might miss showing off to her friends today.

Relunctantly Hope finally gave Lysa the money when they got to the window.

Read this carefully as Lysa points out how we do this very same thing with God.

Lysa had "special knowledge" that in the mailbox waiting for the birthday girl was a card from her grandma that held $50.00 in it. Her ten-dollar bill would pale in comparison.

God has special knowledge into our lives. He has blessings for the radically obedient that make the dime-store stuff we are so intent on holding on to pale in comparison. The question is, do we trust Him? Do we trust that He will bless us? Do we trust that His blessings are infinitely better than what He might first ask us to release?


Read that last question again...Do we trust that His blessings are infinitely better than what He might FIRST ASK US TO RELEASE?

My mind goes to my Mom and the special bond she formed with one of her foster children. I recently posted on this little one. This baby came to my parents unloved and despised by her birth mother and Mom nurtured her, loved her and gave her the best first year of life any mother could give a child. Carmie knew without a doubt that she was loved by my Mom. When the kids were returned to a biological mom that can't support them and has stated how she "hates Carmelita", my Mom was faced with a choice. Curl up in a ball and cry her heart out, which she has shed many tears over this child OR trust in God through the tears and pain. She had to believe that His blessings are better than holding on to Carmie. As painful as these last few months have been missing her, she had to release her to God, not to the biological mother but to God, and because of her obedience He is able to use her in the life of another baby girl.

The next section called 'The Floodgates of Blessing' is probably one of my favorites as my friend Yolanda from Higher Grounds would say, "Bragging on God" moments from Lysa.

Sacrificial giving is one of the few times God asks us to test Him.

On page 129, Lysa tells us how God ties in obedience with blessing.

He wants us to venture into truly abundant giving. He wants us to get out from under our own selfishness with our possessions and accept His invitation to become radically obedient with what we own. Then, not only will He bless us, but He will lavish blessing upon blessing on us.

Did you not love how Lysa shared of when she felt like an out-of-fashion speaker and so she saved $100.00 and invited her fashion conscience girlfriends to shop with her for new clothes? Then came the unexpected phone call from a friend asking for prayer regarding finances and how her family was in desperate need of $100.00 ASAP unaware of Lysa's stash. Lysa listened to God and gave her friend the money with a willing heart. Because Lysa's desire to obey God was greater than her desire to look stylish, she allowed God to open the floodgates of heaven and pour a huge blessing upon her. Instead of canceling her shopping date with her friends she went and tried on clothes with the plan to put on hold what her friends picked out for her and return when she had the money. Her plan was a good one, but God had something else in mind. While in the dressing room she had no idea her friends were also being obedient to God as they paid for the clothes and blessed her with a $700.00 shopping spree!

How awesome is our God?

We can never out do the blessings of our Lord. Never. He just has more up His holy sleeve than we can even begin to pretend to know and He will take us to our knees in praise every time He acknowledges our obedience.

We just have to trust Him ladies!

If we choose to obey and give of our resources in abundance, a feeling of amazing satisfaction will follow. The radical blessing of being able to take hold of a real life----a fulfilled and satisfied life we can't find any other way---will be ours.

The last part of this chapter really spoke loud to my heart. She titled the segment of this chapter, 'The Blessings of a Sacrificial Life'.

God owns it all. We are simply managers of His resources. When we pursue the beautiful opportunities of sacrificial living, we freely acknowledge that truth and then reap the blessings. When we come to understand that we're giving up what was never ours to begin with, we're walking in radical obedience.

I actually wrote the words "Get this Lelia!!" underneath that last sentence in my book.

My husband...God's.

Our kids...God's.

Our grand baby Amiyah...all God's.

Our paychecks...again...God's.

Our house...it's His.


None of what I listed above are truly "mine" and until I get that and stop trying be the control freak that I naturally am, I am missing out on what God has waiting just for me and my family. Until I choose to have a heart that is radically obedient to whatever God asks of me...

My husband will never live up to my unfair expectations

I will have heartache when I don't trust God with my kids and grand baby

I will never feel like we have enough money and will spend foolishly

Housework will be a burden instead of an opportunity to show God I appreciate the shelter He's provided us.

Let's get this dear friends; let's get this today instead of tomorrow.

Please post a comment of what God lays on your heart to share. If you have a blog and have more to bless us with, please sign up below so we can visit you.

~Many Blessings~